Ranjo and Gaurav are married for quiet some time, both had a busy schedule in office and with traffic increasing, it was taking a long time to reach office or back home.
They were blessed with two cute looking kids, and had support of their Parents; Gaurav's parents used to take care of their children until Ranjo returned back home.
Ranjo's mother in law (Lakshmi) was not very educated, so was not able to help the children in their homework, but would surely help the children to change over, give them the evening snacks and sit with them while doing their homework or playing.
Both kids being very naughty some time Lakshmi asked her Husband (Param) to scold them so that they sit peaceful and not fall and hurt themselves.
Ranjo was very caring towards her in-laws, She would take them out for movies, temples or any family get-together. Every festival or Birthday, she would buy them new clothes as well and MIL also reciprocated in the same manner to DIL...
But somewhere Ranjo, always felt her In laws are not as supportive as they are supposed to be, She had nagging complains on them and would bring them quite often to Gaurav. One of her complaint was, that they could prepare dinner by the time we reached home.. rather than waiting for both to come back and prepare the same.
Gaurav used to ask, "you are so supportive to them, you think about them more than me and then why do you have such small complains against them", and explained to her that "you don't like the way my mom cooks and besides your style of cooking is English, continental and Chinese food, wherein they are used to cooking the traditional Dal Rice; so mom keeps all the ingredients ready that you require to cook, don't you think that is a great help",...but she never agreed.
She would say, "I can bring a maid who will do a better job than this and also cook and clean for me, I agree that MIL takes care of kids with lot of love and care," but would continued nagging that, "Your father is always in front of TV and scold's our kids always, He like your sisters kids more than ours, when they are here he gives away the remote to them, he doesn't allow our kids to watch their favorite program and always wants to see NEWS. Kids have to come to our room to see TV...
They are always interfering in any decision we take, I don't have any independence for anything and you always support them, you don't care for me or my kids...because of them I have to cook food keeping their taste also in mind, I have to plan my holiday as per their convenience or going to movies also...They go unannounced to pilgrimage or to their daughter's house and I have to struggle with kids making arrangements and taking leave from office", so on...
Gaurav Tries to explain, "My Parents are taking care of our kids, dropping them to school and picking them up, take them to a park, giving milk and snack and getting them ready in the evening...what else do you expect!!"
But every-time it would be the same story...
And last few months complaints and argument had increased , due to the work pressure in office and the time to travel back had increased because of metro rail work in the city. Gaurav understood the stress she was going through and patiently thought that, she was looking for a way to remove her frustration...
One day when she came up with the same topic, Gaurav very peacefully asked her.."how about we moving to your parents house, which is on the other part of city, close to your office and mine and they will be a support to our kids also, anyway School is equidistant from both the houses, and your brother has moved to US long time and has no plans to come, so it will be a support to your parents as well".
For a moment she didn't react, she was not prepared for this, and then she asked "what about your parents will they not be alone?" Gaurav said "may be for few years let them manage, If I was also posted out in some other country will they not stay alone"....
She didn't talk and went to sleep, she was thinking on the lines for a week and then one day came back to Gaurav and said, "I am not sure... But would love to move near my office, because it will help me reduced the burden, but leaving parents alone, doesn't look a great idea. You Take a call...
Next day morning Gaurav broke the news to his parents saying "we are planning to move near our office as it is becoming difficult for us to travel, and asked if they would like to join, Gaurav's father said, I wouldn't like to move from this house, that's when Lakshmi said, "why do you take house on rent, stay in Ranjo's house for some days, if you are okay then you can move to a rented place and this would be help to her parents also, and kids will also have some support".
Ranjo was surprised with MIL reactions...so Gaurav asked Ranjo to ask if her parents were okay with the arrangement.
Ranjo called her parents and they were more than delighted and made arrangement for them to move in...Ranjo was very happy she had all the control of the house, She tend to become a little lazy expecting her mom to help her in kitchen and other household work...
As days passed by she found no difference between her both the houses. The first shock she got was when her dad said, " I would not be able to pick and drop kids to school as traffic is high and not able to drive", which was the truth and wanted her to arrange for a private transport, when she said this to Gaurav, He smiled and made the arrangement.
She was seeing her father spending most of the time in front of TV, when she asked her mom, why is dad doing this, Mom asked what will he do after retirement, he goes for a walk in the evening and comes back and watches TV, I am not going out as my eyesight has become poor and that is the reason I am not taking kids to the park as well.
Cooking also had slowly come back to Ranjo, her mother said "you and your kids like different kind of food which I have never cooked..so it is better you cook at home". and many more thing which she was nagging at her in laws place, started happening at her place also. She could also feel Gaurav was not comfortable because he used to go early and come back late and any small excuse would go back to his parents place and stay for a couple of days.
One day suddenly without any prior intimation Ranjo's mother said, "we will be going to visit your bother in US, may be by next month first week, he will be sending the tickets, would be staying with them for six months"...She couldn't stop asking "mom you never discussed with me?" Her mother gave a surprised look, what is there to discuss? do you want to join???
Ranjo was hurt...
That day Ranjo didn't speak to anyone, Gaurav knew she was upset and gave time for her to cool down.
Next day when Ranjo finished her work and was back to the room, Gaurav said, "Dear I would like to speak to you and I want you to listen to me peacefully, I would request you not to react but understand and act".
She was in no mood to listen because she thought Gaurav is going to taunt her for what all was happening in her house.
But Gaurav continued and asked her a question, do you love your Sons? And do you think bad for them?
Ranjo got annoyed and snapped back at Gaurav saying, "have you gone mad, which mother or father will think bad for their children...we all are working hard for their betterment, what a ridicule question, you want to argue with me do it properly, I am also fed-up. Of all the things happening around me".
Gaurav smiled and looked into her eyes and pulled her closed to him and said just relax, I know you are upset, I am with you, just listen to me completely and you make a decision and we both will follow that...Ranjo felt so wanted and pampered in his arms and she said OK tell me...
He said, "dear, as you don't think ill about your kids, why will my parents or your parents think ill about us?
They also have slogged hard to give us, a good life and see where we are today... in their capacity they have done best as in our capacity we are doing our best to our kids.
Do you agree? There was no response from Ranjo
If I go by point by point...you also thought my sister kids are being pampered more, I am sure your sister in law would have felt the same when you used to come here, when someone came once in a year, parents would like to show all the affection to them in that few days, because they know they will be leaving soon, when we used to come here as guest your parents also used to do the same.
When you started staying here... your father said, I will not be able to drive in traffic and drop kids to school, please think practically, I don't find anything wrong in that, he is 73 years and do you expect him to drive through this mad traffic....we at our age find it difficult...be it your parents or mine, we have seen them working hard and when they start slowing down in life because of age we are not able to accept.
Ranjo Please let me know what do you do when you have three or four days of holidays come together...first day or so we will have some work, we finish that go out one evening.... next two days will be at home reading, on social media or TV.
Our parents are on a holiday for a long time, due to heath issues they are not able to read or write, they have plenty of time with them what will they do? Naturally see TV.
Their health doesn't permit them to go out, your mother or my mother is not ready to cook because they are not sure if the quantity they are cooking is right, they are worried, if they cook and doesn't come well kids may have to eat the same ... that is the reason from being head cook they start assisting you or me...it is not that they don't want to help you.
You had complain they go unannounced, Yes parents are bugged sitting inside four wall, so when they get an opportunity, they don't want to miss it.
Your parents love you more than me, it is a fact because you are their flesh and blood, like you love your kids more than your brothers kids...that doesn't mean that your parents don't like me, they surely like me as much also. It applies to my parents also.
Let me put it logically, my parents or your parents have worked hard to see me or you happy, now if my mother has a argument with you, she knows you will have a fight with me as well, why will she make me unhappy? Or the other way round...
Before our marriage, your parents or mine have given us advice, suggestion and some time insisted or even scolded us, to take a decision may be small or big. Just because you or me now married and earning, why will their suggestion or advice be wrong, yes I agree they may not be in line with the latest but they will never think bad for us.
My mother came as an outsider to the house, your mother came the same way, today it is known as their house and one day that house will be known as yours...
I want you to think and now act and take decision, don't be upset with your parents, one day you are going to do the same thing, you may deny today but we will walk our parents’ path one day...
After long chat both slept peacefully...
As the alarm rang, Gaurav got up, saw his wife sleeping like a baby, didn't want to disturb her, he got up prepared breakfast and lunch for everyone and came back to wake up Ranjo as she was getting late for office. He said kids are going to school, you get up and get ready I will drop you to office.
Ranjo dressed up and came to have her breakfast, she has never slept so long, anxious parents saw her asked her in one voice, How are you? Hope your health is good? Do you want to visit a doctor? Tears rolled out and she hugged her mother and said sorry mom and dad!!
She looked at Gaurav and said Thanks with her eyes...
She said Dad and Mom; Gaurav and Me are not going to office today I am taking both side parents for a movie and lunch thereafter and asked Gaurav to book tickets for all and asked him to book for the morning show as we should be back before the kids come back home from school.
After the movie and lunch when both parents came back to Ranjo's parents house and were happy, chatting and having coffee, Ranjo said Today after 10 years of my marriage I have decided to go back to my house, not to my In laws house. I am going to my parents house not Gaurav parents house.
I am blessed to have two parents who think so much for me, and always wants us to be happy...both the mothers came together hugged Ranjo and cried and said hope all daughters and sons understand this....
Taking her kids and her husband along with parents, she waved goodbye to her parents and said, "Mom... I am going to, my house...Love you...see you soon!!"
They were blessed with two cute looking kids, and had support of their Parents; Gaurav's parents used to take care of their children until Ranjo returned back home.
Ranjo's mother in law (Lakshmi) was not very educated, so was not able to help the children in their homework, but would surely help the children to change over, give them the evening snacks and sit with them while doing their homework or playing.
Both kids being very naughty some time Lakshmi asked her Husband (Param) to scold them so that they sit peaceful and not fall and hurt themselves.
Ranjo was very caring towards her in-laws, She would take them out for movies, temples or any family get-together. Every festival or Birthday, she would buy them new clothes as well and MIL also reciprocated in the same manner to DIL...
But somewhere Ranjo, always felt her In laws are not as supportive as they are supposed to be, She had nagging complains on them and would bring them quite often to Gaurav. One of her complaint was, that they could prepare dinner by the time we reached home.. rather than waiting for both to come back and prepare the same.
Gaurav used to ask, "you are so supportive to them, you think about them more than me and then why do you have such small complains against them", and explained to her that "you don't like the way my mom cooks and besides your style of cooking is English, continental and Chinese food, wherein they are used to cooking the traditional Dal Rice; so mom keeps all the ingredients ready that you require to cook, don't you think that is a great help",...but she never agreed.
She would say, "I can bring a maid who will do a better job than this and also cook and clean for me, I agree that MIL takes care of kids with lot of love and care," but would continued nagging that, "Your father is always in front of TV and scold's our kids always, He like your sisters kids more than ours, when they are here he gives away the remote to them, he doesn't allow our kids to watch their favorite program and always wants to see NEWS. Kids have to come to our room to see TV...
They are always interfering in any decision we take, I don't have any independence for anything and you always support them, you don't care for me or my kids...because of them I have to cook food keeping their taste also in mind, I have to plan my holiday as per their convenience or going to movies also...They go unannounced to pilgrimage or to their daughter's house and I have to struggle with kids making arrangements and taking leave from office", so on...
Gaurav Tries to explain, "My Parents are taking care of our kids, dropping them to school and picking them up, take them to a park, giving milk and snack and getting them ready in the evening...what else do you expect!!"
But every-time it would be the same story...
And last few months complaints and argument had increased , due to the work pressure in office and the time to travel back had increased because of metro rail work in the city. Gaurav understood the stress she was going through and patiently thought that, she was looking for a way to remove her frustration...
One day when she came up with the same topic, Gaurav very peacefully asked her.."how about we moving to your parents house, which is on the other part of city, close to your office and mine and they will be a support to our kids also, anyway School is equidistant from both the houses, and your brother has moved to US long time and has no plans to come, so it will be a support to your parents as well".
For a moment she didn't react, she was not prepared for this, and then she asked "what about your parents will they not be alone?" Gaurav said "may be for few years let them manage, If I was also posted out in some other country will they not stay alone"....
She didn't talk and went to sleep, she was thinking on the lines for a week and then one day came back to Gaurav and said, "I am not sure... But would love to move near my office, because it will help me reduced the burden, but leaving parents alone, doesn't look a great idea. You Take a call...
Next day morning Gaurav broke the news to his parents saying "we are planning to move near our office as it is becoming difficult for us to travel, and asked if they would like to join, Gaurav's father said, I wouldn't like to move from this house, that's when Lakshmi said, "why do you take house on rent, stay in Ranjo's house for some days, if you are okay then you can move to a rented place and this would be help to her parents also, and kids will also have some support".
Ranjo was surprised with MIL reactions...so Gaurav asked Ranjo to ask if her parents were okay with the arrangement.
Ranjo called her parents and they were more than delighted and made arrangement for them to move in...Ranjo was very happy she had all the control of the house, She tend to become a little lazy expecting her mom to help her in kitchen and other household work...
As days passed by she found no difference between her both the houses. The first shock she got was when her dad said, " I would not be able to pick and drop kids to school as traffic is high and not able to drive", which was the truth and wanted her to arrange for a private transport, when she said this to Gaurav, He smiled and made the arrangement.
She was seeing her father spending most of the time in front of TV, when she asked her mom, why is dad doing this, Mom asked what will he do after retirement, he goes for a walk in the evening and comes back and watches TV, I am not going out as my eyesight has become poor and that is the reason I am not taking kids to the park as well.
Cooking also had slowly come back to Ranjo, her mother said "you and your kids like different kind of food which I have never cooked..so it is better you cook at home". and many more thing which she was nagging at her in laws place, started happening at her place also. She could also feel Gaurav was not comfortable because he used to go early and come back late and any small excuse would go back to his parents place and stay for a couple of days.
One day suddenly without any prior intimation Ranjo's mother said, "we will be going to visit your bother in US, may be by next month first week, he will be sending the tickets, would be staying with them for six months"...She couldn't stop asking "mom you never discussed with me?" Her mother gave a surprised look, what is there to discuss? do you want to join???
Ranjo was hurt...
That day Ranjo didn't speak to anyone, Gaurav knew she was upset and gave time for her to cool down.
Next day when Ranjo finished her work and was back to the room, Gaurav said, "Dear I would like to speak to you and I want you to listen to me peacefully, I would request you not to react but understand and act".
She was in no mood to listen because she thought Gaurav is going to taunt her for what all was happening in her house.
But Gaurav continued and asked her a question, do you love your Sons? And do you think bad for them?
Ranjo got annoyed and snapped back at Gaurav saying, "have you gone mad, which mother or father will think bad for their children...we all are working hard for their betterment, what a ridicule question, you want to argue with me do it properly, I am also fed-up. Of all the things happening around me".
Gaurav smiled and looked into her eyes and pulled her closed to him and said just relax, I know you are upset, I am with you, just listen to me completely and you make a decision and we both will follow that...Ranjo felt so wanted and pampered in his arms and she said OK tell me...
He said, "dear, as you don't think ill about your kids, why will my parents or your parents think ill about us?
They also have slogged hard to give us, a good life and see where we are today... in their capacity they have done best as in our capacity we are doing our best to our kids.
Do you agree? There was no response from Ranjo
If I go by point by point...you also thought my sister kids are being pampered more, I am sure your sister in law would have felt the same when you used to come here, when someone came once in a year, parents would like to show all the affection to them in that few days, because they know they will be leaving soon, when we used to come here as guest your parents also used to do the same.
When you started staying here... your father said, I will not be able to drive in traffic and drop kids to school, please think practically, I don't find anything wrong in that, he is 73 years and do you expect him to drive through this mad traffic....we at our age find it difficult...be it your parents or mine, we have seen them working hard and when they start slowing down in life because of age we are not able to accept.
Ranjo Please let me know what do you do when you have three or four days of holidays come together...first day or so we will have some work, we finish that go out one evening.... next two days will be at home reading, on social media or TV.
Our parents are on a holiday for a long time, due to heath issues they are not able to read or write, they have plenty of time with them what will they do? Naturally see TV.
Their health doesn't permit them to go out, your mother or my mother is not ready to cook because they are not sure if the quantity they are cooking is right, they are worried, if they cook and doesn't come well kids may have to eat the same ... that is the reason from being head cook they start assisting you or me...it is not that they don't want to help you.
You had complain they go unannounced, Yes parents are bugged sitting inside four wall, so when they get an opportunity, they don't want to miss it.
Your parents love you more than me, it is a fact because you are their flesh and blood, like you love your kids more than your brothers kids...that doesn't mean that your parents don't like me, they surely like me as much also. It applies to my parents also.
Let me put it logically, my parents or your parents have worked hard to see me or you happy, now if my mother has a argument with you, she knows you will have a fight with me as well, why will she make me unhappy? Or the other way round...
Before our marriage, your parents or mine have given us advice, suggestion and some time insisted or even scolded us, to take a decision may be small or big. Just because you or me now married and earning, why will their suggestion or advice be wrong, yes I agree they may not be in line with the latest but they will never think bad for us.
My mother came as an outsider to the house, your mother came the same way, today it is known as their house and one day that house will be known as yours...
I want you to think and now act and take decision, don't be upset with your parents, one day you are going to do the same thing, you may deny today but we will walk our parents’ path one day...
After long chat both slept peacefully...
As the alarm rang, Gaurav got up, saw his wife sleeping like a baby, didn't want to disturb her, he got up prepared breakfast and lunch for everyone and came back to wake up Ranjo as she was getting late for office. He said kids are going to school, you get up and get ready I will drop you to office.
Ranjo dressed up and came to have her breakfast, she has never slept so long, anxious parents saw her asked her in one voice, How are you? Hope your health is good? Do you want to visit a doctor? Tears rolled out and she hugged her mother and said sorry mom and dad!!
She looked at Gaurav and said Thanks with her eyes...
She said Dad and Mom; Gaurav and Me are not going to office today I am taking both side parents for a movie and lunch thereafter and asked Gaurav to book tickets for all and asked him to book for the morning show as we should be back before the kids come back home from school.
After the movie and lunch when both parents came back to Ranjo's parents house and were happy, chatting and having coffee, Ranjo said Today after 10 years of my marriage I have decided to go back to my house, not to my In laws house. I am going to my parents house not Gaurav parents house.
I am blessed to have two parents who think so much for me, and always wants us to be happy...both the mothers came together hugged Ranjo and cried and said hope all daughters and sons understand this....
Taking her kids and her husband along with parents, she waved goodbye to her parents and said, "Mom... I am going to, my house...Love you...see you soon!!"
very nice story Sir!
ReplyDeleteif every son and daughter in law is understanding and nonjudgemental towards each other,s parent home will be a heaven.