Great Success or Big Failure

Great Success or Big Failure

Arun was in his mid-forties and for him being successful in his professional life was, what it was. He was always busy with his work and attending a lot of professional and personal development programs. At home or office, he would be always on working mode, either on his mobile or his laptop, sitting in the back seat of his car he would be working, never noticed the changes happening around him and in his own city, 16-18 hours working every day was normal to him. Hopping from one flight to other, from a city to other, he was happy. 

His family had given up on him, he would come late night, heat his dinner which would be kept on the dining table and go back to sleep. Before his daughter wakes up, he would have left for the office or would be sleeping. The only interaction between them would be on Sunday when he would take his family to a temple and then for some meditation class.

Harika, studying her engineering, always wanted to go to more fun places and wanted his father to be away from his mobile. For her going on family holidays was like mother and daughter trip, her father would only be on the phone giving instructions to his team all the time. 

Harshi (Arun's wife) was also working but was very balanced. She used to manage and her home and office very well. Arun was never there for her, she had single-handed managed her house whether it was Harika's school admission or a simple gesture of buying a gift for her in-laws, it was always her. If she asked for his suggestion, he would put it down by saying, I don't have time for all tease silly things.

On a stressful day, Arun collapsed at his worksite and his colleagues rushed him to a nearby hospital and gave some first-aid and doctor asked them to take him immediately to a Multi-Speciality hospital.. He was rushed to a corporate hospital. Harshi also rushed there, no one was able to tell what had happened, after few hours of anxiety doctor informed that they did whatever they could to undo the damage, but much could not be done... Workload took a toll on him and he had suffered a brain stroke, his right side of the body was not functioning... They suggested that some prolonged treatment and therapy may help him recover. Harshi was broken, sat down on the chair, couldn't speak to anyone for some time, she was blank.

She composed herself and walked in to meet Arun into the ICU, tears were flowing out of Arun's eyes. She just held his hand tight, they could not speak to each other but eyes were doing all the talking...She just reassured him that she is their next to him in all times. She called, Harika and asked her to come to the hospital as no one was there at home and told father had a fall at his site and everything is good. In a few days, he will be back home...She called up her in-laws, her family and relatives... Next few days, she had hundreds of suggestions from all her friends and relatives... A few weeks passed off in the hospital and just a day before discharge, she asked Harika to take care of her father as she had to make necessary changes in the house to accommodate him... Arun was trying to speak to Harika, but his speech was not clear as his mouth also was affected with paralysis. She tried her best to answer him back and to do her best to make him feel comfortable, however not much of bonding happened as they never had a great bond. This was the first jolt Arun got. He was sad and thought, what did I do? My daughter has nothing much to talk to me.

When they reached home, he expressed his concern about what had happened the previous day in the hospital with Harika but Harshi didn't give much importance to it and played it down by saying now you will have plenty of time to bond with your daughter, "whatever time you lost with her, make it now..."

The statement of "plenty of time", didn't go well with him, he was thinking about it the whole night and couldn't sleep. He had to call Harshi, even to switch his side, which was making him more uncomfortable. 

The daily schedule like changing, brushing, or picking up a glass of water to anything else, he needed a help and he was very upset. After a week, Harshi had to resume her office job so was looking for some nursing help. After making a lot of enquiry and meeting a number of candidates she could finalize on one. Sunil was ready to extend his time and was staying very close to their house, so she thought he would be a good bet and knew a little bit of cooking too which she thought was an additional add-on.

Arun was given a lot of books to read, which he liked and couldn't read due to his busy schedule & his room was fitted with best TV. For a few months, the arrangement looked pretty good to him. Arun was ok with all his medications and his physiotherapy treatment but as days passed by, he started hating his room and the bed from which he wasn't able to move out. Doctors had promised that if treatment is strictly followed, in a few months he would be able to go out at least in a wheelchair which was not happening, moreover, he was putting on a lot of weight. He reduced interaction with everyone. No one noticed it as Harshi was busy with her house and office work. She was putting that extra effort to make some more incentive for the medical and house expenses which has gone up. Arun's income also stopped. Harika was busy with her studies and friends hardly spend time with her father.

Sunil was helpful but was more focused on his work. Arun suddenly become more aggressive, more demanding of everything. He started complaining about Sunil to Harshi. Harshi, however, ignored his complaints, as she knew that getting another nurse as good as Sunil would be difficult. It irritated Arun further, he would not cooperate with Sunil and it was putting Harshi in a lot of difficulties. 

She started getting calls every hour from the house when she was in office. One fine day she lost her cool and screamed at Arun, thereafter Arun remained silent. He was neither talking to anyone or watching TV or reading his favourite book. He would stare blankly at the ceiling for the whole day... He was thinking about the time he had to spend in office and today no one from office came to meet him. Everybody is busy with their work, He could understand today his daughter wasn't willing to spend time with him because whenever she needed him, he was never there for her. Additional responsibility has made his wife drain in work day and night, at home and in office. He started guiltily for not being for them when they needed and for unable to contribute to help the family.

He couldn't understand why he took so much of work pressure that he burned out so soon in such a young age, so much that now he was unable to help himself too. His guilt made him more quiet and aloof. The sadness moved on to a feeling of helplessness, it was too much for him to handle. On a routine day, when no one was noticing he managed to get hold of a blade and cut his wrist. For a long time, no one noticed and when Sunil noticed, he rushed him to the hospital... 

On the way, he gently tapped Sunil and said, “I was a great success to the world, but a big failure for my daughter and wife…who are my world.”